


Peter Ransom and the Lady Behind the Case

by NobodyOfficial



Category: The Penumbra Podcast
Genre: Angst, Bickering, Canon Compliant, Canon Non-Binary Character, Other, junos POV, junos trying to be good, literally half a sentence, man in glass, mental health, past drug use mention
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-07
Updated: 2020-07-11
Packaged: 2021-03-04 20:07:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 11,796
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25132120
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NobodyOfficial/pseuds/NobodyOfficial
Summary: Not a day after he joins the crew of the Carte Blanche Juno Steel finds himself on his first mission: he's the dashing billionaire bride of one Monsieur Dauphin, played by the understandably cold Peter Nureyev. Armed with his new outlook on life and a ballgown the colour (and size!) of a distant sun, Juno is determined to make a seamless transition into his new life as a criminal.It's crime time, baby. Let's go!(Yes, this is Man in Glass, but from Juno's POV. Like, exactly from Juno's POV. Like, I've literally written the episode as if it were a normal, Juno-narrated ep)
Relationships: Peter Nureyev/Juno Steel
Comments: 52
Kudos: 127





	1. Part 1

**Author's Note:**

> I know we no longer need to put 'I don't own these ideas' disclaimers on fics, but fair warning: for the sake of canon compliancy and making a realistic fic almost all of the dialogue here is lifted from Man in Glass which, obviously, I didn't write. That's kinda dodge, I know, but the scripts are free to read, and I'm not claiming to have written any of it, and I'm not profiting off it in any way. In fact, it was more of a pain to copy it out that it would have been to have written my own dialogue, but I wanted a canon compliant fic for once!
> 
> Anyway: pls don't sue me, I know I didn't write half of this, I'm just a poor student who likes podcasts!

SOUND: MUTED GALA AMBIENCE

JUNO:

It’s true what people say about the view from space. You look at how much there is out there, and you feel your own smallness in the face of it, sure. But you also feel the freedom of it.

Infinite space means infinite room to move around. It means infinite possibility, like if you just looked long enough you could eventually find anything - even yourself.

Makes me feel a little silly for not leaving Mars earlier, honestly.

JUNO (NARRATOR):

Oh, right. Wrong thing to say, or at least wrong person to say it to.

He’s giving me that look again: anger and contempt bubbling on the surface to hide the depth of sadness beneath. It’s a look I’ve become awfully familiar with since I boarded the Carte Blanche, and a look I will do everything in my power to make disappear.

JUNO:

I’ve been thinking a lot about that whole process - finding myself. What I did during it. And… I guess what I'm trying to say to you is…

NUREYEV:

(BRUSQUELY)

That's all very interesting, Juno, but does this really seem like the best time for this conversation?

JUNO:

I… I mean, I guess not, but-

NUREYEV:

Excellent! I agree. If we keep this streak of agreements up, perhaps we will work well together after all.

JUNO:

But, uh, didn’t Buddy say that you had to-

NUREYEV:

Now, it appears they’re checking identification by the door. Come along.

JUNO (NARRATOR):

‘Didn’t Buddy say that you had to talk to me?’ Is what I was trying to say before I was interrupted. Again. He’s been like this since yesterday. Cold. Abrasive. Kinda like me, I guess. The me he’s used to, I mean. I’m starting to worry that’s just how it’s going to be between us from now on; I try to make up for past mistakes while he goes on pretending I’m not trying at all.

I understand why he feels this way, he has every right to feel this way, but I don’t know how much longer I can go on like this.

My name’s Juno Steel, and I’m in love with a thief. A thief who doesn’t even want to look at me. A thief who’s- Left me behind!

JUNO:

Hey! Ransom, wait up!

(PAINED HISS)

Ow, goddamn six-inch heels!

JUNO (NARRATOR):

Buddy’s done that on purpose. The heels. The whole outfit, even. I can’t say I’m not grateful. Though maaaybe I could’ve shown that gratitude a little better.

SOUND: SHIP AMBIENCE

JUNO:

What the hell?

BUDDY:

Problem, Juno?

JUNO:

I thought we were going on a heist, not getting married?

BUDDY:

If you’d listened to the brief you’d know that you’re doing both. You and Ransom are to-

JUNO:

Yes, I know, pose as newlyweds. Is that really necessary? We couldn’t just be… work associates?

BUDDY:

It has to be believable, darling, and with a relationship as close as yours and Ransom’s we thought this was the best course of action.

JUNO (NARRATOR):

It was then that I couldn’t help but wonder what exactly Nureyev had told her about me. Buddy had mentioned at yesterday’s so called “family meeting” that Nureyev and I had a history of working well together. If you consider him lying to me about being a Dark Matters agent, evading arrest, breaking into my home, gambling with my life, getting me kidnapped, losing my eye over a bomb that was never even a threat to begin with, and stealing my-

(LONG, CONFLICTED PAUSE)

And stealing my heart “working well together” then yeah, I guess we did.

But I didn’t say anything. I couldn’t. Nureyev was giving me that look - bitterness and sadness and fear all intermingled with a hint of “this is all your fault” - that let me know he was on thin ice and I had to keep my mouth shut.

In a way, I had driven him to this. It was supposed to be me and him, fleeing across the universe and causing all kinds of mayhem; that’s what I’d agreed to. But then- Then I left, taking all of Nureyev’s hopes for the future with me.

The least I could do was cover for him. And agree to the dress.

JUNO:

But does it really have to be so _huge_? I’ll never be able to reach my blaster under all those ruffles.

BUDDY:

Good, because you won’t be needing it. This is a stealth mission, Juno, your only objective is obtaining the Map.

JUNO:

Alright, but what if we run into trouble? Those heels, that dress; I’m vulnerable.

BUDDY:

And isn’t that exactly what you need to be with Ransom right now?

JUNO:

(CHOKED)

I-

BUDDY:

(REFERRING SOLELY TO NOTHING OF THE SORT)

I am referring solely to you posing as his wife, of course.

JUNO:

Oh, yeah, uh, of course.

BUDDY:

Don’t worry, I’ll have a word with Ransom, ensure you two are on speaking terms this mission.

SOUND: FOOTSTEPS RECEEDING

JUNO (NARRATOR):

Buddy saw right through me. Something told me she saw right through everyone.

The ballgown in question is a monstrous, glittering, golden thing, complete with six-inch, strap-on golden heels, and a golden jeweled eye patch to match. Neither my style nor something I wish could pull off. But I’ll have to if this heist is going to go smoothly.

My initial thought was to enlist Nureyev to help with my disguise; with just a stick of eyeliner and change of shirt he can become an entirely new person. But I didn’t think I could take being hit with another one of those looks. So I went with the next best thing.

RITA:

Oh my God Mistah Steel - or should I say Missus, since you’re married now and all - this is so exciting! Our first heist as a family! And you asked me, Rita! to help with your disguise!

JUNO:

(STRAINED)

Are you nearly done with that zipper? I can barely breathe in this thing, I don’t know how Ransom deals with those corsets.

RITA:

All done, boss. Wow, you look real pretty. Pretty enough that _you_ could be _my_ secretary. Imagine! 

JUNO:

Just help me with the makeup, will you? Nothing extravagant, just use the golds Buddy left me.

RITA:

Have you seen Mr Ransom today? He has a whole new face! And this weird, thin little moustache, don’t remember that being in the brief. Should I be drawing you on a tiny, little moustache, Mistah Steel?

JUNO:

No, Rita, thank you.

Ransom, did he look- Huh, I don’t know.

RITA:

What happened the last time you saw him? I don’t wanna pry - I know, that’s a first - but all I knows is you went away for a few days and came back without an eye, acting more mopey and depressed than usual. Is he the one who took your eye? Should I kick his ass, boss?

JUNO:

No, it’s… it’s complicated. If anything, I took something from him. And I want to make it up to him, but he just won’t give me the chance.

RITA: 

He probably just needs time. If he was even half as sad as you were after whatever happened he just needs a while to work through it. And maybe a robot implanted and then removed from his brain. I can help with that last part, if ya want.

JUNO:

(CHUCKLES)

That’s alright. I like Ransom’s mind as it is.

RITA:

Well, once I’m done with ya, boss, he’ll have no choice but to talk things out. You’re gonna be the prettiest lady at that ball.

JUNO:

I appreciate that, Rita, but tonight can’t be about me. This is our chance to prove we can work well as part of this team. I won’t get into anything that could jeopardize the mission. And that means I’m going to need you on standby at the comms.

RITA:

But Captain A said all communication is to go through her.

JUNO:

(DISGRUNTLED)

Hmm.

JUNO (NARRATOR):

This relying on other people, or, more specifically, relying on other people who aren't Rita, is going to take a bit more work.

Thankfully, communication is Buddy’s strong suit. 

BUDDY (COMMS):  
Juno. Ransom. Have you made your grand entrance yet?

NUREYEV:

Nearly. The line at the entrance is extensive.

JUNO:

It’d move faster if they’d let us go through more than two at a time.

BUDDY (COMMS):  
That, darling, is what we call a “red carpet bottleneck.” When you reach a certain level of fame or wealth you forget completely how to enter a room any other way than with a twirl, three bows, and a herd of paparazzi drooling at your feet. And everyone at a Nova Zolotova gala crossed that threshold years ago.

JUNO:

Plenty of other thresholds around here. Can’t we just skip this part, take a side door or something?

NUREYEV:

No. _Everyone_ is taking the red carpet. We’ll have to blend in if we want a clean escape from this place.

JUNO:

Do I look like I’m blending in to you? I’ve seen suns less bright than the gown Buddy threw at me!

BUDDY (COMMS):  
All camouflage, darling. If you need to hide something dark, you do it in the shadows; if you need to hide a parrot you do it in a clown.

JUNO:

(SLIGHTLY HURT)

I never said I looked like a _clown_.

JUNO (NARRATOR):

In fact, quite the opposite. Rita did such a good job with my face that for a moment even Nureyev couldn’t take his eyes off me.

NUREYEV:

I hate to interrupt, Captain Aurinko, but we’re nearly at the front of the line.

BUDDY (COMMS):

Excellent. You remember the plan?

JUNO:

(DOES REMEMBER THE PLAN)

Sorta.

NUREYEV:

(ZONED OUT FOR ALMOST THE ENTIRE PLAN)

Every word.

BUDDY (COMMS):  
Good. then I’m ceasing communications in case anyone is monitoring for comms calls. I’ll see you when you have the Map in hand. Good luck.

JUNO (NARRATOR):

So maybe I’m spotty on the specifics, but I paid attention to Buddy’s brief and I read over the plans. Once. 

We’re after the Map, deceptively named as it’s actually a crystal-covered globe, small enough to fit in your pocket if you have the pockets of a thief. It’s being auctioned off here, a trillionaire’s satellite mansion, and Nureyev and I are to bid on it. Using a fake bank account courtesy of Rita, of course. And aliases courtesy of Nureyev.

SOUND: SCROLLING ELECTRONIC GUEST LIST 

DOORMAN:

Dauphin, Dauphin… Ah! There you are. And have you cleared an account for purchases this evening?

JUNO:

Of course we have an account. It’s right here.

DOORMAN:

Oh, you don’t have to show… me… Oh! That’s... sizeable.

JUNO:

You’re damn right it is.

JUNO (NARRATOR):

Suddenly his hand is on my shoulder. Nureyev’s. It’s a light touch, lean fingers against my bare skin, but after a day of barely even meeting my gaze it’s… a lot. After everything, Peter Nureyev still makes me feel a lot.

He guides me away from the doorman.

NUREYEV:

Delightful. Now, may we?

DOORMAN:

Oh… Right!

(AMPLIFIED)

Monsieur and Madame Dauphin!

SOUND: LIGHT APPLAUSE 

JUNO (NARRATOR):

There’s a large crowd gathered at the end of the carpet. There’s an even larger crowd gathered in the ballroom. I’m not unused to being watched, but more in a metaphorical sense. Their literal gaze, burning and judgmental, bores into my skin. My stomach drops in that way that it does when I find myself up uncomfortably high.

Then it drops further still as Nureyev takes my hand. He lifts it delicately above my head for me to twirl.

I begin to, trying to give the air of a person who twirls frequently. Then I feel one of my shoes buckle beneath me and realise I’ve failed. All there is to do is brace myself to hit the hard marble floor.

But… but I don't.

SOUND: AUDIENCE AND JUNO GASP. NUREYEV SIGHS

Nureyev has caught me in a kind of dip, as if that was our plan all along. For the first time in a year he looks me right in the eye and for just a moment nothing else matters: not the audience, not the mission, nothing. All that matters is Nureyev’s gaze, still angry, still pained, but now tinted with a softness I’d once take for granted.

JUNO:

(NERVOUS LAUGH)

Pretty smooth, right?

JUNO (NARRATOR):

He seems frozen for a moment, eyes trained so closely on my lips I’ve almost convinced myself he’s going to kiss me.

Instead he pushes me back to my feet, a little more harshly than a lady would like to be pushed, and begins to weave his way out into the ballroom.

JUNO:

Hey!

SOUND: HURRIED FOOTSTEPS

Hey-

(CHOKES ON NUREYEV’S NAME)

Dauphin!

(WHISPERED)

I really think we should talk. Not now, but-

NUREYEV:

(HISSED WHISPER)

Not. Now. Exactly. _Now_ you need to keep your head down and let me do what I do best.

JUNO:

(ANNOYED)

Fine. You see this thing we’re here to steal yet?

NUREYEV:

In due time, dear. In due time.

(WHISPERED)

And perhaps we shouldn’t say _that_ word so loudly, hm?

JUNO:

(TIRED OF BEING CONDESCENDED TO)

 _Fine_ , that _Map_ we’re here to steal. Sorry, I didn’t know you were such a stickler for specifics.

NUREYEV:

We must be careful. We will not be the first thieves to steal from Mr. Zolotov.

JUNO:

You don’t say.

NUREYEV:

Nova Zolatov’s past parties have been legendary, Juno-

JUNO (NARRATOR):

As Nureyev re-explains the case- Job to me, I survey the room. There’s an armed guard on every door, by every table, even a few intermingling with the guests. Something’s off about their blasters, but I can’t focus with Nureyev monologuing in my ear like that.

NUREYEV:

\- all of which makes them excellent prey for thieves. 

JUNO:

Right. And that’s why security’s so intense at this thing: Zolotov must be spooked or something, cuz nobody’s seen him since he got smashed-and-dashed a year ago.

If a guy that hungry for the spotlight stays out of it for a year, he must be pretty shook up.

NUREYEV:

(SURPRISED)

… Precisely.

JUNO:

Uniformed guards at every corner… Zolotov isn't hiding his anxiety, that’s for sure. Looks like he’s showing it off.

Okay, so where do we start? Auction begins in… one hour.

NUREYEV:

Hm. Well. I think that we should start by lying low until that hour is over, and then proceeding with our original plan.

JUNO:

Sure, obviously, but-

NUREYEV:

Between my experience and the diameter of your gown, I think I’m likely better suited to case the room. So I will seek out the map we’re after, confirm our points of exit, and scope out the other guests for firearms.

JUNO (NARRATOR):

So Nureyev sees me as a liability. The dress isn't the problem - though I can’t say the same for the heels - he’s seen me press on with a case with a gaping hole where my eye should’ve been. It’s me; he doesn’t trust _me_.

I want to reassure him that I won’t mess this up for him, won’t mess anything up for him ever again if I can help it, but I can’t. That would be messing up.

JUNO:

That’s a lot. And what am I supposed to do?

NUREYEV:

Not draw attention to yourself. Enjoy a refreshment, perhaps. Silently. 

JUNO:

Okay, funny joke, but seriously-

NUREYEV:

(IMPATIENTLY)

Look for Zolotov if you like. You have the photo of him, yes? Just look for the man with the terrible haircut.

JUNO:

(LAUGHING)

Yeah, what even is that? Looks like a lion and a wet cockatiel had a really ugly-

NUREYEV:

Goodbye.

JUNO:

But hang on, what am I supposed to do when I find… uh, him?

JUNO (NARRATOR):

He’s walked away, already out of earshot. So much for our aliases. So much for his expertise.

I want to let myself get pissed off at him, demand that he talks to me. We’re going to ruin this mission, and all succeeding missions, if he keeps this up. But I remind myself that that’s his prerogative. If he wants to be cold and distant it’s up to me to accommodate him. For the time being, anyway.

It’s only been a day. He’ll hear me out eventually.

I look around for something to busy myself with. Nureyev’s sharp goodbye has earnt me a little unwanted attention I’m eager to shake.

Instinctively I reach out to fill my pockets with hors d'oeuvres, but I’m not sure I trust the seams of this dress. So I do what Nureyev, albeit sarcastically, told me to do: look for Zolotov.

The hall is massive and crowded. If people aren’t gushing over famous faces at one end of the room they’re ogling the band at the other. If they’re not perusing the auction items they’re filling up on lavish food, drink, and intoxicating substances. Everyone’s busy, everyone’s occupied, except…

Except one young woman. I’ve had my eye on her for a while now. She flits between social groups, always loudly announcing her presence, but no one seems happy to see her, no one seems to know who she is. And at a party full of somebodies, being an apparent nobody is suspicious.

She’s standing next to a waiter with a tray of thin-stemmed glasses, so I make to take one and approach. 

JUNO:

Hell of a gala. This place is fancier than even I’m used to.

NOVA:

Oh, you’re too kind. With a gown like that I can scarcely believe it.

JUNO:

This old thing? It’s nothing, an engagement gift to myself.

NOVA:

An engagement to go with the gorgeous gown? You’re too lucky! What did you pay for something so downright scrumptious?

JUNO (NARRATOR):

Uuh… I don’t even think my wedding dress cost more than a hundred creds. The dress is one from Buddy’s old days of thieving, I’m sure. Once a stolen piece of highly coveted fashion, now seen as a perfectly reconstructed retro design.

There are five hundred million creds in our fake account, with the implication that that’s only a small fraction of our wealth. Is a dress worth more or less than the Map?

JUNO:

Just two hundred and fifty million creds.

NOVA:

Oh, pricey.

JUNO (NARRATOR):

Oops.

NOVA:

But I wouldn’t expect anything less from such a classy lady.

JUNO (NARRATOR):

Oh, thank goodness.

JUNO:

I wish my husband shared your sentiments.

NOVA:

He doesn’t want to show off his beautiful wife?

JUNO:

No, he wants me all to himself.

I had to sneak away just to get myself a drink.

JUNO (NARRATOR):

I raise the glass to my lips, but hesitate when I remember what Nureyev said about opiates at parties like these. There’s no guarantee this is alcohol, and that’s the last thing I need to deal with right now.

JUNO:

What about you? I couldn’t help but notice you’re looking a little lost at sea.

NOVA:

And that’s just the way I want it, darlin'! Everything’s as I planned it.

JUNO:

Oh, really?

NOVA:

That tone! Lady, you could be a detective!

JUNO:

(NERVOUS)

Huh-

NOVA:

Lady, what is your name?

JUNO:

Dauphin.

NOVA:

Charming, simply charming. 

Dauphin, can I let you in on a little secret?

JUNO:

As long as it’s where you got that stunning haircut.

NOVA:

Really you are too much!

(WHISPERING, BUT NOT REALLY)

This is my party! But no one recognises me because of the, well, you pointed it out right away!

JUNO:

The haircut, of course.

Well Miss Zolotov-

NOVA:

It’s Zolotovna now. Old Earth tradition.

JUNO:

Miss Zolotovna, I must congratulate you on throwing such a fantastic gala.

NOVA:

Oh, they’re not as fun as they used to be, not now that I need all this extra security. Apparently I’m just irresistible to thieves!

JUNO (NARRATOR):

But not my thief. He’s staring daggers through me, and no amount of microexpressions seem to be catching his attention.

JUNO:

Well, with all these guards around you won't be needing the attention of thieves. Where did you hire these guys: beefcake gunman incorporated?

NOVA:

Now my dear Miss Dauphin, I do not think I have ever laughed so vigorously at one of these stuffy parties in my life!

JUNO:

That’s Madame to you, lady.

NOVA:

“Lady!” With a sneer! Nobody has ever talked to me that way! Madame, you are a cad, and a card, and if you keep this goin’ you might just be my new best friend!

JUNO:

Well in that case, you really must meet my husband, Monsieur.

JUNO (NARRATOR):

I look back over at Nureyev and he finally seems to have got the hint; he’s making his way over here.

NUREYEV:

Dear. Dear!

JUNO (NARRATOR):

Pretty needy for a man who’s been ignoring me for the past five minutes.

JUNO:

Hey, and there he is now!

NOVA:

The mysterious Monsieur! Well, now! It sure seems like gowns are not all you have good taste in. How much would you like for this sharp-faced man in the window? I’ve been thinking of picking one up just like him.

JUNO (NARRATOR):

The way she looks at Nureyev makes me sick. He’s a price tag to her, a commodity. I despise people who look at other human beings and think they can be bought and sold. But she can’t know that.

JUNO:

Toss me half of what I paid and we’ll call it even.

NOVA:

Oh, you are a wicked woman, Madame!

NUREYEV:

(GETTING PISSED)

Hello! My love! May I speak with you a moment?

JUNO:

Just a sec. Come over here, toots, I got somebody I want you to meet!

NOVA:

Toots! You will say anything, won’t you, Dauphin?

NUREYEV:

It’s urgent!

NOVA:

Oh, now he’s mad! Why’d you have to go and make him mad, you bad, bad Madame?

JUNO:

Maybe we know that price down to a third of the gown instead.

NOVA:

At a price like that, dear, I'd be an asteroid-farming fool not to pick him up. You must bring him back to me once you have wiped that pout off his face.

JUNO:

Sure, I-

NOVA:

You must.

JUNO:

Uh…

NOVA:

I’ll have my checkbook ready. Just give me a number.

JUNO:

(NERVOUS LAUGH)

Okay? I’ll… get on that.

JUNO (NARRATOR):

With each word that woman speaks it gets harder for me to hide my disgust at her. Nureyev can’t be bought, certainly not with creds, but not with pretty words, either. I’m learning that quickly. Morality means everything to him, no matter how hard he tries to hide it, and all you have to do to catch his eye is the right thing.

I lean in close to Nureyev, feigning affection as I prepare to tell him what I just learned, but he starts speaking first, fast and angry, hand gripping my hip to keep me close.

NUREYEV:

(HISSED)

What in the hell do you think you’re doing?

JUNO:

Having a drink, like you told me.

NUREYEV:

And her?

JUNO:

She came with the drink.

NUREYEV:

Unbelievable!

JUNO (NARRATOR):

No, you know what’s unbelievable, Nureyev? Your lack of faith in me.

JUNO:

Listen, I get that you’re the master thief here-

NUREYEV:

Do you “get that?” Do you?

JUNO:

\- but you’re not really giving me anything to work with!

NUREYEV:

I did. I told you not to draw attention to yourself. I told you-

JUNO:

So what do you think, that I was just goofing off or something? I was doing my job.

NUREYEV:

Which is what, exactly?

JUNO (NARRATOR):

I’m sick of this. I’m about to blurt out loud that I’d identified the mark, when thankfully an announcement cuts me off.

SOUND: ANNOUNCEMENT CHIME

DOORMAN:

(AMPLIFIED)

Attention, guests. Attention. We will now begin tonight’s auction. If you would all kindy take a seat before the main stage, we can begin-

NUREYEV:

Never mind. Let’s find seats, quickly.

JUNO (NARRATOR):

I begin to sit, but Nureyev grabs my hand, hauling me up again. I’m about to shake him off when I remember to keep up pretenses. Plus, he isn’t holding me so tightly now, just guiding me through the rows of seats.

NUREYEV:

Not in the back- far too obvious.

DOORMAN:

Thank you, thank you…

JUNO (NARRATOR):

We sit and I lean in close to Nureyev, hoping to pick up the conversation where we left off, but he barely acknowledges me. He has the kind of terse look on his face that I’m told I get when I’m overthinking something.

I nudge his arm with my own, but nothing.

JUNO:

(HISSED)

Dauphin.

Dauphin.

(QUIETER)

Ransom!

Goddmanit, will you listen to me? I’m trying to tell you that-

DOORMAN:

(CLEARS THEIR THROAT)

And now, dear guests, if I may present our host…

NUREYEV:

Shh! This must be Zolotov!

JUNO:

That’s what I’m-

SOUND: DRUMROLL

DOORMAN:

Rejoining us after a year in solitude… the one… the only…

SOUND: CYMBAL

NOVA:

Nova Zolotovna! Charmed, you’re sure.

(LAUGHS)

SOUND: CROWS CHEERING

NUREYEV:

She… that woman you were talking to… is…

JUNO (NARRATOR):

The confused look on his face would be adorable if it hadn’t been brought about by his own ignorance.

JUNO:

Yep. Our mark. Like I was trying to tell you.

NOVA:

(AMPLIFIED)

That’s right, my friends, that’s right…

JUNO (NARRATOR):

I watch Nureyev’s jaw slacken further as Nova talks. In the past I might have gloated, goaded him for not listening to me sooner, but now all I want is to get him to trust me again. So I let him rest his hand on my thigh, lean in as if to kiss me on the cheek, and whisper-

NUREYEV:

She doesn’t look anything like the person in the photos Buddy gave us.

JUNO:

That’s probably cuz she-

NOVA:

My great transformation… the metamorphosis, that nobody expected, the change that shows the real me, as I always was… I got a haircut, y’all!

SOUND: APPLAUSE

NUREYEV:

Oh, yes, a haircut! I see it now. That _is_ good.

JUNO:

Way better, right?

JUNO (NARRATOR):

He purses his lips and turns away from me, but his hand doesn’t move from my thigh.

NOVA:

But enough about little old me. What do y'all say we begin the charity?

SOUND: APPLAUSE

JUNO:

She says she changed her last name cuz of some tradition on Earth. Must be really confusing, changing your name every time you get a haircut-

NOVA:

First up for sale…

NUREYEV:

(HISSED)

Why didn’t you tell me who she was?

JUNO:

Uh, cuz you didn’t let me?

JUNO (NARRATOR):

I try to keep my voice soft, but at this point he seems to be actively antagonising me. Trust is hard. Teamwork is hard. And both are made harder when your teammate refuses to trust you.

NUREYEV:

This is the first I’ve heard of Juno Steel needing permission to speak.

JUNO (NARRATOR):

Well, you’ve been away a while. There’s probably a lot you haven’t heard of Juno Steel.

JUNO:

Listen “Ransom,” what the hell is your problem right now? No, scratch that, I know what your problem is, so don’t you feel like we should talk about it?

NUREYEV:

Is there a reason you only bring this up when it’s most inconvenient, Juno?

JUNO (NARRATOR):

He’s leaning in again, lips close to mine, hand sliding further up my thigh. It’s intentional, surely. A display of character; we're pretending to be in love, after all. But I wish he wouldn’t stare so softly at my lips like that. Makes it hard for a lady to remember he’s pretending.

JUNO:

Find me one convenient time, then! One! Cuz we’re both clearly distracted-

NOVA:

(BACKGROUND)

And next up for bidding…

NUREYEV:

Perhaps we wouldn't be so distracted if one of us wasn't so _distracting-_

JUNO:

Shh.

NOVA:

The Gilded Globe of Reaches Far...

JUNO (NARRATOR):

I push Nureyev away, turning his attention back to the auction. We can’t, not even for the mission, not even to stay in character. There’s a lot I want to say, have to say, before I get to kiss Peter Nureyev again.

Zolotovna is talking about the globe, or at least trying to talk about the globe and getting distracted talking about herself. Nureyev watches her, scowling, unfocused, out of character.

JUNO:

So you gonna bid anytime soon, or…?

NUREYEV:

Delightful. You have to bicker, even at the most important moment in our work. The pinnacle of piracy, this Madame Dauphin.

NOVA:

I hear two million creds in front!

JUNO:

It’s my first day on the goddamn job, alright?

NUREYEV:

And oh, but it shows.

JUNO (NARRATOR):

For the first time since boarding the Carte Blanche I allow myself to feel annoyed at Buddy. Nureyev and I are both novices at this, if you think about it: me to thieving, him to thinking about anyone but his goodman self.

No, no. That’s not fair. Nureyev is just new to teamwork, even more so than I am. I’ve always had Rita. He’s had no one since he was a teenager.

My point being, Buddy could’ve sent anyone out on this mission. She and Jet are at least as skilled as Nureyev, and both are leagues ahead of me, they could’ve pulled this off. Or either one of them could’ve posed as Nureyev’s spouse. Point is, I don’t have to be here, screwing everything up.

No, Steel, keep it together. You found the mark when Nureyev couldn’t. You haven’t blown your cover yet. You’re out of your depth, but you’re doing just fine. Nureyev’s just bitter, that’s all.

JUNO:

You wanna lay off, pal?

NUREYEV:

I’m “laying on” because you’ve made this job a disorganised disaster!

NOVA:

That’s ten million creds from the man who _will_ give me his number!

JUNO (NARRATOR):

I probably shouldn’t have shown that doorman our account, that wasn’t very befitting of a billionaire. And I messed up our entrance, or would have if not for Nureyev. And when he antagonised me I rose to it; I was speaking loudly enough to blow our cover. Maybe I should just get us out of here. The sooner I get myself out, anyway, the better.

JUNO:

(HISSED)

Fine! You want to get out of here? Then let's get out of here.

(SHOUTS)

Five hundred million creds!

SOUND: CROWD GASPS

NOVA:

Oh my! That is a jump of… four hundred and eighty eight million creds, to the charming Madame Dauphin!

JUNO (NARRATOR):

Uuh, I’ve done something bad.

NUREYEV:

That is every cred we have! What are you doing?

JUNO:

Oh, whatever, it’s not even real money.

NOVA:

(BREATHLESS)

Five hundred million…? That’s five hundred, going once…? Going twice…?

JUNO:

So let’s just pick the damn thing up and leave.

NOVA:

Oh… but… I can’t resist! I bid one billion creds for my Gilded Globe!

SOUND: APPLAUSE, SURPRISED WHISPERS

JUNO + NUREYEV:

(FLATLY)

What.

JUNO (NARRATOR):

I’ve messed up. I have to call Rita. I fumble for my comms.

NUREYEV:

One billion?

JUNO:

That’s bad. How do we get more money in the account. Like, right now?

NUREYEV:

Call the Captain. Quickly!

SOUND: COMMS BEEP

NOVA:

Well? Anybody wanna match that? Madame Dauphin?

JUNO:

Come on, come on, Rita…

NUREYEV:

Rita? I told you to call the Captain!

JUNO:

Well, the Captain would just put Rita on the line, alright? This is faster!

JUNO (NARRATOR):

Nureyev’s been ignoring one of Buddy’s orders all day, now it’s my turn.

NOVA:

Oooh, look at the two little love birds peckin’ at each other! Far be it from me to profit from a lover’s quarrel, but…

I almost forgot! Going once…

SOUND: COMMS BEEP

RITA:

Hi, Rita’s room, this is Rita!

MUSIC: JUNO’S THEME, BUT IT’S DIFFERENT. IT HAS FAR FEWER NOTES IN COMMON WITH ‘HYPERION CITY.’ IT’S FRESHER, NEWER, LIGHTER

JUNO:

Rita! Quick, I need you to hack another billion creds into our account.

NOVA:

Going twice…

RITA:

A billion? I can try, boss, but-

NOVA:

And sold, to the charming little lady from the middle of Nowhere, neptune: Nova Zolotovna!

RITA:

… Boss?

JUNO:

Never mind. We’ll figure it out. Don’t tell Buddy.

RITA:

But-

SOUND: COMMS BEEP

JUNO (NARRATOR):

I can fix this.

JUNO:

So this, uh… isn’t great.

JUNO (NARRATOR):

Nureyev is glowering at me, gaze hot and steady enough to shoot a laser straight through my brain.

Then his face softens. But not into affection, comradery, or anything so friendly. It’s pity. Nureyev pities me for being so out of place on this mission, pities himself for being stuck with me, probably.

And that, more than anything, makes me annoyed. Makes me furious. 

He can ignore me, scorn me, leave me out of his plans. Fine. He should reserve the right to make me prove my trustworthiness. But he shouldn't pity me.

I called Buddy because I needed a way out of Hyperion. But when she said we worked well together, that I work well with Jet and Rita and even Nureyev, she wasn’t wrong. I’m a capable detective, and that should make me a capable thief. I _will_ be a capable thief.

Cuz now the only option open to us is to steal the Map right from under Zolotovna’s nose. Nureyev will need my help with that, like it or not.

Juno Steel is not a tragedy. Juno Steel is not someone to be pitied. Maybe I messed up, and maybe I just want to run away and have Rita fix everything I’ve left behind, but no. No. I don’t leave things behind anymore.


	2. Part 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I did it in under a month! Yes! Narration gets a little more... disruptive, I guess? In this part, bc there's a lot of canon speech in the first scene and I didn't want to be basically posting man in glass. And I changed exactly two canons words in this chapter! Oh no! But hopefully no one will notice which ones...

SOUND: GALA AMBIENCE

NUREYEV:

I cannot believe we are in this position. I cannot believe _you_ have put us in this position. If you’d just let me do my job-

JUNO:

What are you talking about, this is my fault? There was no way in hell Zolotovna was ever gonna sell that goddamn map!

NUREYEV:

Well, I suppose we’ll never know, will we? Your little five hundred million cred stunt happened, and here we are.

JUNO:

So, what, you think she just got excited and couldn’t help herself?

NUREYEV:

You’ve put that very concisely just now. Are you certain _you_ don’t think it, Juno?

JUNO:

It was her favourite goodman piece! I’m telling you, she was never gonna let it go! That was her plan from the start!

JUNO (NARRATOR):

We’re wasting time. Nureyev must know this, being a so-called master thief. I can see his gaze flicking around the room, casing for exits, for a route to the map, for anything to use as a distraction. And, I bet, a corner to stick me in while he completes the heist on his own.

Maybe I’m biased, but there is something to be said for a bit of self depreciation every once in a while. Would it kill him to concede one argument?

(SIGH)

My name’s Juno Steel. I’ve been a thief for just over twenty four hours, which apparently qualifies me to be one of only two agents on a multimillion cred heist. My unwilling partner is Peter Nureyev, currently Ransom, alias Dauphin.

I hurt him once, in a past that feels galaxies away right now, and he thinks that gives him an excuse to hurt me in the present. Maybe it does, I don’t know. But I do know that now isn’t the time to be thinking about that. What we need is a plan to snatch that Map.

JUNO:

Alright. Look, fine, it’s my fault, I don’t care. But-

NUREYEV:

Oh, no, no, no, Juno, you will not get out of this by “taking the high ground-”

JUNO:

\- but we need a plan, and now. People are gonna start taking the portraits and the statues and the little platinum robots and whatever the hell else they bought soon, and we need to get that stupid orb before then.

NUREYEV:

It’s a _globe_.

JUNO (NARRATOR):

You’ve got to be kidding-

NUREYEV:

But you do have a point. It’s most likely that guests will start to leave after the dance, which begins in… half an hour. Well.

JUNO (NARRATOR):

Half an hour, plus the ball will act as a great distraction for our get-away. Maybe things aren’t so dire after all.

JUNO:

Some good news, anyway. The ball should last a couple hours; that gives us time to put together a plan.

JUNO (NARRATOR):

I watch Nureyev’s face for any sign of relief, any sign that I haven’t messed up as badly as I’d thought, but there’s nothing. The aristocratic mask that was Dauphin has shattered, and what’s beneath is… imperceivable. Not Nureyev - try as he might to erase them he has the same tells and expressions as any man - but something else. Emotions flicker like miasma's face, too fast for me to pin them down.

NUREYEV:

No, I’m afraid it does not, Juno. The Gilded Globe of Reaches far, in case you have forgotten, is on the opposite end of the ballroom floor. This may come as some surprise, but one generally tries not to steal something mere feet away from hundreds of witnesses. No, no; I’ll have to take it now. The old-fashioned way.

JUNO:

But-

NOVA:

Oh, Madame Dauphin! Yoo-hoo! When do I get to meet that _man_ of yours, darlin’?

NUREYEV:

There. And while I’m busy deactivating the necessary cameras and stealing the Globe, you can distract Ms. Zolotovna. Ta.

NOVA:

Aww, Dauphin, don’t let him slip away from me _again_!

JUNO:

(FRUSTRATED GROWL)

JUNO (NARRATOR):

But slip away he does, slinking into the crowd and leaving me here with Zolotovna. Before she can start talking I slap a huge smile on my face and turn around.

JUNO:

Oh, you know men and their socialising. He just had to catch up on the latest gossip.

NOVA:

Of course, of course, anybody who’s anybody is at a Nova Zolotovna party. You just stick with me and let him enjoy it, honey.

JUNO:

My husband, dashing as he is, tends to leave the business side of things to me. I’ve been wondering, what exactly is this gala in aid of?

JUNO (NARRATOR):

The language doesn’t come as easily to me as when I was Dahlia Rose. Duke was easy to love, an attentive husband, and knew when to lower his mask to let Nureyev shine through. 

I can’t figure out who Monsieur wants me to be.

NOVA:

(UNSURE)

Oh, uh, you know, medical advancements and, uh, what not. The tags, uh- that doesn't matter! What matters is that I throw one hell of a gala, huh? Helping out all those poor little… it’s just a nice bonus, is all!

JUNO (NARRATOR):

Tags! That must be The Board of Fresh Starts! A vile, faceless pseudo-government agency that works with pharmaceutical megacorps to take people’s autonomy in exchange for a chance at a new life. The people who currently have their calling card secured around Vespa’s wrist. The people who think the life of a mindless puppet is one worth living.

JUNO:

You said it, lady! It’s all about the showmanship. Or, show wo-manship.

NOVA:

Oh, you are just too much!

JUNO:

Speaking of showmanship, what kind of blasters do your security use? They are just gorgeous.

NOVA:

Madame, I didn’t strike you for a gun-lady! Such a pretty dress; such a pretty face!

JUNO:

Where do you think I got these scars? My taste in hobbies matches my taste in fashion: expensive.

NOVA:

If you’re not just the most fascinating lady I’ve ever met!

Well, since you asked, I’ll let you in on another secret: when I hired these guys they came with the _ugliest_ standard blasters, that would just not do, totally clashed with my decor. So I told them I wanted the blasters to match with the aesthetic _or else_. They told me that wasn’t possible, but I threw a few millions creds at them and suddenly it was a whole different story.

They’re fake, of course, but I like to think the threat is enough to keep thieves away.

JUNO:

And what if it’s not?

NOVA:

Well, I thought of that, too. Not just a pretty face. I had security updated at two AM _this morning_. Anyone trying to pull anything off will be spotted instanely by my automated system.

JUNO:

(DISTRACTED)

Fascinating.

JUNO (NARRATOR):

Two am. Almost a whole day after the last time Buddy and Rita updated our intel.

I could trust Nureyev to do his job, to be the galaxy’s greatest thief he claims to be, but this isn’t a question of trust. As good as Nureyev is we’re working with a dangerously unpredictable force here, and relying on intel gathered by others. I’m not second guessing him; I‘m pulling my weight as part of a team.

I survey the room for cameras I remember seeing on Rita’s map: in a flower by the side of the room, the base of a column, in the eye of a painting, in the lapel of a guard. All accounted for, all destroyed.

Then I spot Nureyev, seemingly deep in conversation mere feet away from the Map, poised to strike at any second. And right there in front of him, balanced on top of a stem like a dry, shrivelled bud, is another camera. Unbroken, and pointed right at Nureyev.

JUNO:

I, uh, remembered, uh, I have to talk to my husband about someth- I gotta go.

NOVA:

(BACKGROUND)

What? Madame, are you quite alright?

Just can’t keep your hands off that man, I get it.

JUNO (NARRATOR):

I weave my way across the ballroom floor, trying to catch Nureyev’s attention, but he doesn’t notice me.

JUNO:

Hey, honey?

Dear?

Monsieur?

JUNO (NARRATOR):

He takes a step back and removes his hand from his pocket, raising it slowly towards the Globe.

JUNO:

Hey, “ _dear_!” We really need to talk!

Like, right now! Hello!

Goddmanit, are you even listening to me?

JUNO (NARRATOR):

He isn’t, and he’s about to pluck that gem-studded sphere from its pedestal while Zolotovna’s galaxy-class security watches on.

So I do the only thing I can do: I hitch up my skirts, forget about my shoes, and run.

JUNO:

Honey, I said _look out_!

SOUND: RUNNING, THEN ‘OOF.’ CROWD MURMURS

JUNO (NARRATOR):

I hit him harder than intended, knocking us both to the ground. I twist to take the brunt of the fall, landing on my weak shoulder.

JUNO:

(GROANS)

NOVA:

Madame Dauphin! Madame Dauphin, my goodness, what has gotten into you?

NUREYEV:

Juno… you… I…!

JUNO (NARRATOR):

Nureyev looks incensed, angrier than I’ve ever seen him. He scrambles to stand, but I hold tightly to his arm, keeping him in place. I can’t let him up until I figure out how I’m going to play this.

JUNO:

Uh, nothing to see here, folks! Just… saw a bee on the old hubby here, so I-

GUEST:

No you didn’t!

GUEST 2:

Bees are extinct!

JUNO:

(NERVOUS)

Yeah, that’s what I thought, which is why I kinda… freaked…

JUNO (NARRATOR):

This is worse, this is worse than just getting caught.

I grab Nureyev’s lapels as he tries to stand again, then bury my face in his chest to disguise the action.

There must have been something genuine in my makeshift hug, because I feel Nureyev raise a hand and rub it reassuringly up my back.

JUNO:

Would you all believe me if I told you I just really, really wanted a hug?

NOVA:

Madame Dauphin… if that isn’t just the sweetest thing I’ve ever heard! Oh, when I have a man like your Monsieur I’ll be like a hyper-intelligent squid with a candy store, all hugging and grasping and… anyway!

SOUND: NOVA CLAPS TWICE

Back to it, y’all, back to it- let’s let the lovebirds have their moment in private.

JUNO (NARRATOR):

I finally released Nureyev. He at least has the decency to rise slowly, rather than shoving me away.

I try to follow him, but my shoulder won’t take my weight, and I find myself slumped pathetically back on the floor. I poke at it, trying to feel if the bone has separated again, but the fall seems to have done nothing but agitate old wounds rather than create new ones. I can live with that.

Nureyev has caught on by now that this isn’t part of my act, and reaches down to help me up. Our fingers touch, and for just a second he lets the mask slip. I see a sliver of the same gentle concern he’d shown me back in the martian tomb.

Then we’re standing, and his expression is one of immovable stone.

NUREYEV:

You incompetent… idiotic…

JUNO:

Impatient, too, so let’s get out of here. Pronto. 

NUREYEV:

And why, hm? Why should I listen to a word you-

JUNO (NARRATOR):

He’s talking too loudly, too openly, near too many people who almost saw him steal the Map.

I drag him a couple of steps away, closer to the band, then put my hand on his cheek, hiding our lips, and pull him in for a kiss in which our lips will never touch.

JUNO:

Because, goddamnit, there’s another security camera looking right at you!

JUNO (NARRATOR):

The stony expression crumbles, and the mask shatters, and Nureyev’s face dissolves to make space for that blank expression of existential dread. He looks over my shoulder, visibly pales, then locks his eyes back on mine and… they’re blank, too.

At this moment Peter Nureyev isn’t just a thief without a name, but a thief without a face, too. And it scares me.

JUNO:

Come on. Walk with me. We’ll talk closer to one of the cameras you knocked out.

It wasn’t your fault, Zolotovna had her security updated since we last checked- Hey? Are you even listening to me?

NUREYEV:

(NOT LISTENING)

Hm?

JUNO:

I was telling you that our research is outdated. Everything Buddy pulled for us-

NUREYEV:

No, no, that’s impossible. She gathered it just yesterday. I checked it myself.

JUNO (NARRATOR):

I lean against the column Nureyev destroyed a camera in earlier and pull him in front of me. Almost instantly, without even thinking, he wraps slender fingers around my waist to pull himself close, and leans in. I have to blink hard before I continue talking.

JUNO:

Yeah, well, yesterday sounds real impressive or whatever, until you account for the fact that Zolotovna boosted security around here at two am _this morning_.

NUREYEV:

This morning? But that’s… so incredibly insecure. Her team would have no time to test anything.

JUNO:

Almost got you, didn’t it? You’re one of the best.

NUREYEV:

One of… what?

JUNO:

Not a mastermind - the opposite. She's dangerous because she's so goddamn rich that everyones afraid to tell her she doesn't know anything. It all looks unique, sounds showy, but it's… just kind of a mess. She hired private security, but wouldn't give them real blasters because it would ruin the decor; hell, Rita told me that the password to her uncrackable accounts system was “remember-to-change-the-password-to-something-better-later-Nova.” being surrounded by nothing but yes-men makes you an easy mark, sure- but it also makes you unpredictable, because you won’t throw out even the worst ideas.

NOVA:

(BACKGROUND)

Those are shrimosas, i made ‘em myself-

JUNO:

Case in point.

NUREYEV:

I always assumed she handled her affairs herself. Where are these “yes-men?”

JUNO:

 _Exactly_.

NUREYEV:

… Come again?

JUNO:

You know what would happen if i tried to blow a billion creds on my own statue? Rita would stop me. Probably you and Jet and Buddy and, hell, we’ll invite Vespa too- but you all would jump out of the goddamn woodwork to stop me, beat the hell out of me, probably.

JUNO (NARRATOR):

Nureyev frowns at this and I shake my head to dismiss him. Old habits; didn’t mean it.

JUNO:

So why didn’t anybody stop _her_?

NUREYEV:

Because they never stop her from doing anything.

JUNO:

Exactly. She has the Globe because she’s the cash cow for the people we’re after. But she doesn’t know a goddamn thing about it, and she couldn’t even name one pharma-megacorp she’s actually invested in.

JUNO (NARRATOR):

All my nerves about Nureyev almost getting caught have faded now. It barely even registers that his lips are still millimeters from my face.

_This_ is what I’m good at. _This_ is what I do. This, I realise, is why Buddy offered me the job. Not because she thinks she can groom me to become some master thief, but because I assemble words into narratives like children assemble jigsaws.

I’m not at this gala to hang off Nureyev like some side piece, I’m here to do my job.

JUNO:

She’s never even heard of the Board of Fresh Starts. And honestly, I can’t tell what’s worse, you know? The people who built those goddamn debtor’s tags they use in the Cerberus Province… or people like her, who just have money and throw it wherever they have to in order to make more of it.

JUNO (NARRATOR):

Nureyev pulls back from me a little. His cheeks flush, and for a moment I think he’s about to go on a tirade against me again, but all he does is drop his gaze from my eyes to the column behind my shoulder.

He’s embarrassed, I realise. Embarrassed by the way he’s been acting so superior to me this whole mission, only to mess up and have me pick up the pieces.

He drops his hand from my waist to take my own and squeezes once. I do the same. We have a lot to say to each other, Nureyev and I, but not right now. Right now we still have a Globe to steal.

I look to Zolotovna for a moment, hustling up to the band, her gown and her hair and her shoes and her neck dripping with gemstones, and when I look back to Nureyev his expression has changed again.

His gaze is intense, yet gentle, lips parted into a half-smile, showing just the tip of pointed canines. It stirs something in me, something terrifying and exciting and almost-forgotten. Nureyev has looked at me like this before, when I was drunkenly ranting about the fate of Cassandra Kanagawa.

The feeling Zolotovna ignites in me is moral outrage, I realise, and Rex Glass- Peter Nureyev- Monsieur Dauphin- the man in front of me, can’t take his eyes off me.

SOUND: APPLAUSE

NOVA:

Alright, y’all! Get your dancing shoes on, because it’s time to trip that light fantastic! Take it away, gentleband!

SOUND: MUSIC PLAYS

NUREYEV:

Juno.

JUNO:

Hm?

NUREYEV:

The ball is starting. And I don’t intend to leave here without that Globe.

JUNO:

Me neither.

NUREYEV:

Then… may I have this dance?

JUNO:

Thought you’d never ask.

JUNO (NARRATOR):

I haven’t danced since… yeah. A long time ago. Sometimes it becomes a necessity for a case, to blend in, and I’ll tap my foot in the corner of the room. And, of course, there have been times when I was so intoxicated I didn’t know what I was doing.

But this - Nureyev bowing slightly, offering his hand, pulling me close - I never thought I’d dance like this again. But if there’s anyone else I’d rather dance with…

NUREYEV:

My, Juno, you are quite the dancer. I never knew.

JUNO:

Had a good teacher.

NUREYEV:

And it shows. How versed are you in sleight of hand?

JUNO:

Sleight of hand into pocket? Not bad. I shoplifted about a quarter of my lunches between the ages of 8 and 11. But you’re the master, so-

NUREYEV:

Master or no, I’ve too many eyes on me now, Ms Zolotovna’s especially.

JUNO:

Really? Let’s find out. Dip me.

NUREYEV:

With pleasure.

JUNO (NARRATOR):

I allow a single breath to steel myself, then lean backwards into Nureyev’s arms. He looms over me, eyes soft but distant, concentrating on holding me up. Lips just too far away to kiss.

Good, I tell myself. Juno Steel will always be distracted by a pretty face and a moral compass, there’s no denying that, but he’s learning not to rush into things. Some people don’t want to treat you like a passtime, some people just want you there while time passes.

JUNO:

Whoa, yeah, she's staring holes through you, isn’t she?

NUREYEV:

Only through my clothing, I believe, but it does make stealth more difficult. Spin.

JUNO:

Sure thing.

Damn dauphin, you’re not half bad yourself.

NUREYEV:

Quite. Did you see the Gilded Globe’s location in relation to us?

JUNO:

Sure.

NUREYEV:

Excellent. We’re going to switch partners now. Several times, if necessary. I will make my way towards Zolotovna and distract her; you will approach the Globe, store it in your gown, and then meet me at the edge of the ballroom floor. Does that sound acceptable?

JUNO:

Yeah, Ransom. Yeah, I think I like this plan a lot.

JUNO (NARRATOR):

I flash Nureyev a smile, soft and sweet and vulnerable, like Buddy would have wanted, but with a hint of determination. Nureyev all but faints.

He squeezes my hand, I squeeze back, then he twirls me out into the dance floor.

I move from dancer to dancer, twisting and stepping in such an alluring way people toss their partners aside to catch me.

For the first few minutes I can feel Nureyev’s eyes on me as he makes his way to Zolotovna, but then I turn and he’s looking away, deep in conversation with the wretched lady herself. 

Okay. So he really does trust me. Cool.

I allow myself to spin past the Map a couple of times before I actually reach out to take it, but once it’s in my hand I panic. It’s obscured in the folds of my dress, but the woman I was supposed to be dancing with next is reaching out to grasp my hands. I feel around, desperate to tangle the Globe securely in one of my skirts, even consider stuffing it into my underwear, before I remember whose gown I’m wearing. Buddy would never wear an outfit without pockets.

I find one just in the nick of time, stuff the Globe as far down as I can reach, then spin my way back into the midst of the dance floor.

SOUND: MUSIC ENDS

JUNO:

Dauphin-

NUREYEV:

(DISTANT)

Look at my wife, will you?

JUNO (NARRATOR):

I pull up short and pretend to busy myself with some-

(SIGHS)

Shrimosas.

Nureyev is still deep in conversation with Zolotovna, and seemingly talking about me. Or, at least, Madame Dauphin. But we have the Map now; he needn't bother.

JUNO:

Hey, uh, honey? I think… isn’t it time for us to go… dear?

JUNO (NARRATOR):

But Nureyev presses on. He raises a hand dramatically to his forehead, and Zolotovna gestures to a nearby security guard. For a moment my chest sinches - he’s sold us out for a government’s ransom - but I push the thought away. Nureyev wouldn’t do that; he’s too good for that.

Right on cue, he waves a hand and Zolotovna dismisses the guard.

I’m about to shout to Nureyev again when I see Zolotovna reach into her dress and press something into his hands. Jewelry, it looks like. He grasps her hands and says something emphatic, which leads to her removing even more of her accessories and handing them over to Nureyev.

I don’t know what to think. This is daylight robbery at its finest, he’s literally asking her if he can steal from her, and she’s saying yes! And she deserves it, God knows she does. But what does Nureyev want with what seems to be millions of creds worth of jewels? And if he can take them from her, here, at her own party, while I was already robbing her blind on the other side of the ballroom, what can’t he take?

He walks towards me now, Zolotovna watching him retreat, but doesn’t slow.

JUNO:

What the hell was that?

NUREYEV:

No questions. Just start walking.

JUNO:

But-

NUREYEV:

Quickly!

SOUND: COMMS BEEP

Captain Aurinko. We’re nearly at the door. And we’re going to need that ride as soon as possible.

BUDDY (COMMS):

I’ll get Jet right on it, darling. Buddy out.

NOVA:

(BACKGROUND)

Mr Dauphin! Wait!

BUDDY (COMMS):

What is that?

NUREYEV:

I hope I never find out.

NOVA:

I can’t take another moment of this secrecy! Our enemies be damned, I… I _love_ you!

(AMPLIFIED)

I said I love you! And I don’t care if your wife knows it!

JUNO:

She… looks like she’s waiting for something.

NUREYEV:

She’s waiting for you to kill me, likely so that she can pull a deathbed confession of true love from me; and given that neither of those things is going to happen, I recommend we turn our walk into a run.

DOORMAN:

My God, Ms Zolotovna! The Gilded Globe of Reaches Far has… disappeared!

NUREYEV:

A very fast run. Go!

JUNO (NARRATOR):

Nureyev takes off running and I make an admirable attempt at following him in these heels, but then he turns and grabs my hand, steadying me.

We run together, through the front door, down the entryway, through the car park, and to the airlock where Jet is waiting in the Ruby 7. His face, as usual, betrays no emotion, but it’s a reminder to me that soon we’ll have to face Buddy, and while our mission was successful it was in no way a success.

SOUND: FADES OUT THEN SHIP AMBIENCE FADES IN

A SUBSTANTIAL SILENCE

BUDDY:

Um-

VESPA:

I told you we should’ve shifted the lot of them. All this could’ve been avoided.

BUDDY:

If by ‘all this’ you mean our obtaining the Map then yes, tossing Pete, Juno, and Rita out the airlock certainly would have prevented that.

VESPA:

You can’t seriously tell me you think they did a good job?

JUNO:

Hate to agree with Vespa, but we were a mess out there.

BUDDY:

You were a mess, yes, but I also think you did a good job.

NUREYEV:

I would just like to say, Captain, that I can do better. I allowed myself to get distracted, which in turn distracted Juno. This was all my fault, but give me a second chance, please. I’m better than this.

JUNO:

Hey, it wasn’t all Ransom’s fault. I got short with him too quickly. Shouldn’t have done that.

BUDDY:

Oh, so now you know how to work as a team? Pity you couldn’t have worked that out before your mission.

JUNO (NARRATOR):

When we’d returned to the ship all I wanted to do was lock myself away in my room and take off these goddamned shoes. But apparently when you’re part of a family you have to sit around the dinner table and debrief the day’s events.

We could have lied, but then what? Buddy would’ve seen the ‘wanted: Madame and Monsieur Dauphin’ posters that are sure to be sent out around the galaxy. Plus, Jet saw how we arrived at the car: nervous, suspicious, and out of breath. Those are not the traits of two thieves who’ve just pulled a successful con.

BUDDY:

Make no mistake, darlings, I had expected our first, and objectively simplest, heist to go more smoothly than this.

Pete, I sent you in there with Juno for a reason. He is a smart, quick, perceptive young lady and one of the best detectives in the solar system. You treated him like a talentless, start-up thief, which was also an unfair assessment on your part, as Juno proved to be fine at even that. In failing to rely on your partner you wasted precious time, weakened your aliases, and almost cost us the Map.

But Juno, that doesn’t mean your own performance was without flaws.

RITA:

I think Mistah Steel did a great job-

BUDDY + VESPA:

Shh.

BUDDY:

Rita, dear, you can congratulate him later.

RITA:

Sorry, Captain Mom.

BUDDY:

Right.

Juno, like everyone aboard this ship, your reputation precedes you. I’d heard, and seen first hand, that you can have quite the temper when things aren’t going your way.

JUNO:

(LIKE A SULKING CHILD)

You make me sound like a sulking child.

BUDDY:

Apologies. But the fact remains, while you showed immense restraint, the times you let your anger get the better of you did interfere with the mission. One should not snap at their partner, no matter how much they are provoked. One should also not attempt to jeopardize the mission just because one is not receiving suitable attention.

I expected better from both of you.

That being said, you did pull off a high-security, multi-billion cred heist in under a day’s notice, and escape without so much as a scratch, and for that I must commend you both. Neater work next time, please, but we have secured the Map and for that I am deeply grateful.

Family dismissed.

SOUND: CHAIRS BEING MOVED. INDISTINGUISHABLE CHATTER

RITA:

(FAKE WHISPER)

Mistah Steel, you gotta tell me everything, everything-

JUNO:

I will, I promise, only- Not tonight. There are… other people I need to talk to tonight.

RITA:

Ooh, okay, I get it! But we have a brunch date tomorrow!

SOUND: FOOTSTEPS

BUDDY:

Juno, could you spare a moment?

JUNO:

Uh, sure? But I’m dying to get out of these heels.

BUDDY:

This won’t take a second.

(SOFTER, TO JET)

What do you make of the thief?

JET:

(SOFT)

He is… not what I expected. He thinks with this heart.

BUDDY:

Mmm, good.

SOUND: JET WALKS AWAY. ONLY BUDDY AND JUNO REMAIN

JUNO:

What was that about?

BUDDY:

Never you mind.

I just wanted to congratulate you again on your success this evening. I knew I could make a criminal out of you.

JUNO:

Much as you might hate to hear it, I wouldn’t call this a crime. This is a service to the people. The opposite of crime.

BUDDY:

(TO HERSELF)

And just when I thought you were learning.

(TO JUNO)

The opposite of crime is not justice. The opposite of crime is abiding by the law. Crime does not always mean bad, and law does not always mean good.

JUNO:

I- yeah. Yeah.

BUDDY:

I did not bring you aboard because I saw criminal potentiality in you-

JUNO:

Like Ransom?

BUDDY:

Heavens, no! I brought him aboard for the exact same reason I did you: your moral core. You can talk mightily about lawfulness and righteousness, but at the end of the day you do what _you_ think is right, you follow your own moral code. I like your moral code, Juno. And I like Peter’s.

JUNO (NARRATOR):

I think back to my last case with Nureyev. The way he betrayed Miasma the second he realised what she was trying to do. Maybe he was even planning to betray her from the get-go.

The way he ran when he had to, and came back for me when he didn’t.

JUNO:

Is that what you wanted to say to me? You like my morality?

BUDDY:

No, I genuinely wanted to express to you that I was impressed with your work. And also ask you this: is this work, with this crew, for this mission something you wish to continue with?

JUNO:

Wha- Are you firing me? I wasn’t that ba-

BUDDY:

No. of course not. I’m simply offering you an out.

You’re a people pleaser at heart, Juno, always making choices based on what’s best for everyone else. There’s no denying that if our mission is successful it will help a lot of people. I’m sure that appeals to you, makes you want to stay. But all that business aside: will you be happy in this family?

JUNO:

Well, Rita’s already settled in here. And if I go Ransom-

BUDDY:

I didn’t ask about them. I asked about you, Juno.

JUNO:

(UNSURE)

I, uh- It’s all very new to me. A team. The heists. In space. That makes me feel-

BUDDY:

I’m not your therapist.

JUNO:

\- makes me feel vulnerable. Like I should be running away to something more familiar.

But being here is good for me. I like being here. I’m not going anywhere.

BUDDY:

That’s all I needed to hear.

Go on, get out of that gown.

SOUND: FOOTSTEPS FADE OUT

JUNO (NARRATOR):

I do.

I wash off the makeup, comb the product from my hair, and change into an old nightdress. Instinctively I reach for my overcoat, but stop. Buddy was right; if i want to do this I have to be vulnerable.

I can hear her in the hallway, shouting through Nureyev’s door, so I wait; thinking about what I’m going to say, and about Peter Nureyev.

Now I have a decision to make about who Peter Nureyev really is. I saw a lot of different sides to him today: the physically affectionate but emotionally cold billionaire, the sharp, bitter master thief, the confused, faceless man, and just a flash of the Nureyev I knew a year ago, warmth and faith and cunning.

When Nureyev gave me his real name I had assumed it came with his real face, but now I’m not so sure. The Nureyev I met could have been another mask, painted to appeal just to me. Maybe the real Nureyev is the man who snaps at me when I do something wrong. Maybe the real Nureyev is suave and overly flirtatious. Every time I think I have him pinned down he pulls out another facet of his personality to pin me in return.

The question I keep mulling over is this: who is the real Peter Nureyev? Or, who do I choose to believe he is? 

I choose to believe… I believe that there is no fixed Peter Nureyev, just as there is no fixed Juno Steel, just as there’s no fixed anyone. I’m the girl who helped kill Annie Wire, and the lady who blamed himself for it all his life, and the detective who realised that day wasn’t about him, and never had been. I’m the officer who shoots without thinking, and the private eye who can’t shoot for fear of missing, and the teenager who holds a blaster and breaks down thinking of his brother. I’m the toddler from Halcyon Park, and the girl from Old Town, and the teenager crying in the sewers, and the officer with a needle in his arm, and the disgraced Captain. And I’m also the best damn detective in Hyperion, the lady who just wants to do good, the lady who wants to live, the lady who _knows how_ to do good, the vigilante, the thief, the rebel.

If I can be all those things, all those people, all at once, why can’t the same be true of Nureyev?

Sure, he can separate these aspects of his personality, give them names and faces and fashion senses that aren’t his own, but ultimately, deep down, they’re him. His flirtatious nature dialled up to eleven, his moral compass all dressed up in a suit and a wedding ring, his beliefs about how an aristocrat acts. All him. All Nureyev. The parts of him that I love and the parts that infuriate me.

Nureyev did not give me his true self that night, but rather a rare fragment of it. That large, jagged centre piece of glass you can rebuild the rest of the mirror around. We are not solely our pasts, I know that better than anyone now. Nureyev is everything that happened with Mag as a child, and everything that’s happened, and everyone he’s been, since, and to pretend otherwise would be willful ignorance.

Nureyev isn’t some mysterious thief who swings in to sweep me off my feet. He’s a man with a lot of past, and a present, and a future. And I like that. I like Peter Nureyev. And maybe now, now that I like him, I’ll be able to love Peter Nureyev in the way he deserves.

I wait a few moments after I hear Buddy’s receding footsteps before knocking on his door.

SOUND: KNOCKING

NUREYEV:

Yes, come in, come in.

SOUND: DOOR OPENS

JUNO (NARRATOR): 

He’s perched awkwardly on the edge of the bed, costume and makeup removed, wearing a face that I recognise.

JUNO:

(AWKWARDLY)

Hey there.. Ransom.

NUREYEV:

Oh, just close the door and drop the silly moniker. I already regret choosing it.

JUNO:

Okay, Peter, then-

NUREYEV:

And not that, either. Everyone who's ever called me “Peter” has wanted to be my parent. Even if I've only let a few fit the role.

So, please: just call me what you used to.

JUNO:

But… your name…

NUREYEV:

I’ve already torn the room apart looking for recording devices, and there are none. Just close the door, if you would.

JUNO:

Okay.

SOUND: DOOR CLOSES

So, Nureyev. I’ve been thinking that we should probably. Um. Talk. About us.

NUREYEV:

So have I.

JUNO:

I know you don’t want to, but…

Wait, what?

NUREYEV:

I think we should talk, too, but if you keep standing there while we do it you’re going to make me terribly nervous. Please. Sit. 

JUNO (NARRATOR):

I move to take Nureyev’s desk chair, but before I can even take a step he’s shuffling slightly along the bed, making room for me. I sit, my hand centimeters from his.

JUNO:

(BASHFUL)

Cool. Thanks, Nureyev.

(RELUCTANTLY, BUT WITH RELIEF)

Listen. I just… wanted to say I’m sorry. The last time we saw each other, that night… I messed up. I don't know if that hurt, or how much it hurt, but that doesn’t matter- I shouldn’t’ve just walked out. And… (FADE OUT)

SOUND: A WHOLE NEW MIX OF JUNO + NUREYEV’S THEMES

JUNO (NARRATOR):

I go on like that for a while. Too long, maybe, but I have a lot to say. A lot to own up to. A lot to explain without ever excusing.

Nureyev watches me intently, reacting to every word with the smile of Duke Rose, the laugh of Rex Glass, the biting frown of Monsieur Dauphin. Or, no, rather: the smile of Peter Nureyev, the laugh of Peter Nureyev, the biting frown of Peter Nureyev, the man I left without even a goodbye.

Eventually I’ve said my piece. I stop, look Nureyev in the eyes, and wait for his response.

He says nothing. For a long, long time he just watches me watching him. I can see my reflection in his glasses, vulnerable and eager, with just a hint of fear. Fear that I’m still not getting it right. Fear that I was never good enough for him, and never will be. Fear that when I left that night I did so for the right reasons. 

I pulled a disappearing act on the invisible man, and no one likes to have their signature move turned against them.

But then I feel his hand slide on top of mine. His gaze shifts from my face to my eye; to my soul. And he says, soft as silk, sweet as honey, just as he always used to:

NUREYEV:

Juno… (FADE OUT)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aha! Betcha thought you were gonna get my interpretation of Juno's apology in this one, but no! I'm pulling a Vibert! Really I'm hoping they're going to come back to it in canon, but idk... Also, this is like 6k long, I don't have time for the whole apology speech!
> 
> Thank you so much for reading! All your comments on the last chapter are so sweet; I appreciate y'all so much!

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you enjoyed me desperately trying to write from Juno's POV! Thank you for reading! Hmu on tumblr at kindofwriter if you ever wanna talk penumbra, or literally anything else, I swear I have more than one interest (but, alas, never at the same time)!
> 
> Idk when I'll get round to part two. This took me about five hours in total, but those five hours were spread across a month bc I kept getting distracted by other fics ':D so we'll see. Maybe tomorrow; maybe next month!


End file.
